In these days when, certainly in the West, people are expected to live into their eighties or nineties, anyone who does not live to those ripe old ages are regarded as being ‘taken too soon.’ It has been a common theme when I have received cards and other messages of sympathy when people heard that Deborah had gone to be with Jesus.
It is almost an expression of pity, of the lack of
fulfilment, of the loss of the hopes and dreams. It is as the normal is to live
as close to the age of Methuselah as it is possible today with the aid of
nutritional benefits and medical advancement.
Yet, and I write this through the bitter tears of deepest
sorrow, we are missing something remarkable in the gracious, loving acts of our
Father. Perhaps we are missing that those who live longest have not fulfilled
what God has purposed.
Throughout the Bible, we hear the tearing of the fabric of
life and observe the uttermost grief when we read of lives that we would
consider cut short. The Scriptures are honest and speak of people who have died
when it does not make sense.
In the fourth chapter of our Bible, there is the untimely
demise of Abel whose life was dramatically ended by Cain. In the midst of the
agony, so ably portrayed by the artist William Blake, there is the torment felt
by Adam and Eve, who were indeed the first parents who had to bury their child
– surely the wrong way round in anybody’s eyes.
The torment continued in what is often considered the
oldest book in the Bible as Job heard of the deaths of his seven sons and three
daughters when a mighty wind came in from the desert to strike down the house
where the children were feasting, and they were killed instantly in the rubble
(1: 18 – 19). There was no proof that the children had acted immorally or
foolishly. Indeed, Job covered all the bases by routinely offering up
sacrifices to God after one of their meals, thinking ‘Perhaps my children have
sinned and cursed God in their hearts’ (1: 4 – 5). The following chapters tell
of Job and his three ‘friends’ trying to come to terms as to why suffering
happens. The conclusion comes in chapter 42, after God had spoken, where the
resolution is not the ‘why’ of suffering but ‘who’ is with you during the
suffering – in verse 2, Job addresses God: ‘I know that you can do all things;
no plan of yours can be thwarted.’ Although verse 12 of that chapter informs us
that ‘the Lord blessed the latter part of Job’s life more than the first,’ and
that the amount of livestock doubled, he had the same number of children as
before. We cannot fathom how his heart still broke when he thought about his
first sons and daughters – it was a remnant of his former life before the
suffering.
The experience of loss at an early age continued as human
history continued. In Genesis chapter 35, Jacob’s favourite wife, Rachel, died
during childbirth so she was no older than her mid-forties and probably in her
thirties. Her husband was so bereft that, over her tomb, he set up a monument
which was still evident at the time of the original readers. It would be
interesting to surmise whether the subsequent narrative regarding Joseph would
have been different if she had been a guiding and protective hand, but it was
not to be and the history of the Israelites has been defined by the slavery in
Egypt and its subsequent redemption.
Further on in the Old Testament, we encounter the tragedy
of Naomi and her husband Elimelech, who with their sons Mahlon and Kilion, left
Bethlehem because of a famine and settled in Moab. After her husband and sons
had died, Naomi and one of her daughters-in-law Ruth left that country to
return to Bethlehem. It is at this point that the romance between Ruth and Boaz
is concentrated on, with the birth of Obed (an earthly ancestor of Jesus)
celebrated. As Naomi bounced Obed on her knee, it would be tempting to think
that she had put behind her the devastating deaths that she had experienced.
However, that is not what happened because, when she returned to her home town,
she instructed the inhabitants: “Don’t call me Naomi…Call me Mara, because the
Almighty has made my life very bitter. I went away full, but the Lord has
brought me back empty. Why call me Naomi? The Lord has afflicted me, the
Almighty has brought misfortune upon me.” (Ruth 1: 20 – 21) This woman demonstrated
her anger, frustration, loss and being downcast, without any false sense of
triumphalism or pretending that she understands, Those people who have
experienced the passing into glory of a loved one at an early age can fully
understand her feelings.
As a widow whose husband died whilst in his early years,
Clarissa Moll finds this Old Testament example one that she could identify
with: ‘Naomi travels her grief journey with far less finesse [than Job or
Hannah]. That’s precisely why I like her. When your theological arguments are
exhausted and your patience turns to anxious urgency, you need a woman like
Naomi to tell you like it is.’ (Beyond the Darkness: A Gentle Guide for
Living with Grief and Thriving After Loss, p. 135)
There was no living ‘happily ever after’ if we read the
book properly, knowing that all the people mentioned had real emotions. Naomi
must have wondered what the outcome would have been like if Elimelech had not
died, and if her sons had not been childless and could have fathered Obed.
Clarissa Moll surmises, with great perception: ‘I have no doubt as she held
this baby in her arms Naomi thought of Mahlon and Kilion. Naomi probably
glanced up and thought about what might have been. This baby she held in her
arms would bear no resemblance to her son, the man who died without fathering a
child. When God was giving her after loss was something entirely new. Had God
proven himself faithful over time, despite her distrust, anger, and unbelief?
Yes. Had he answered all her questions? We are never really told.’ (p. 148)
The sense of loss at an early comparative age continues
into the New Testament. In Luke 2: 36 – 38, we are told about Anna the
prophetess who had lived with her husband for seven years after her marriage
and then was either eighty-fours years-old or had been a widow for eighty-four
years depending on the reading of the text. It was a long time to be alone so
she did not find solace in another man, even though the Law allowed her that
option, but preferred to spend her time in worshipping God in the Temple. We know
that she had natural emotions, so she must have been bewildered to be by
herself on earth, the Bible does not say that she was given an insight as to
what was going to happen in the latter stages of her life. There must have been
the inevitable grief and heartache that seemed to have no resolution. Often,
there is no other person that replace the one who has gone to be with the Lord
but it is the nearness of God that be the only replacement, however hard that
be.
The next example was John the Baptist who was six months
older than his cousin, so he was only in his early thirties when he was
executed. The ‘crime’ that John had committed was that he had told Herod how
things really was – that God was judging the ruler for living with his brother’s
wife. The response from Jesus on hearing about his cousin’s death was not
stoicism or pretending that it did not happen. Instead, the Bible tells us that
Jesus withdrew privately to a solitary place (Matthew 14: 13). It is clear that
he wanted to think things through, to mourn a man who he loved. The Scripture
clearly shows that Jesus did not leave his emotions at the heavenly portal (as
John 11: 36 demonstrates) and he would have been wracked with grief as the rest
of us experience.
It was going to get worse as the early Church started. It
must have been perplexing for the believers when Stephen was first arrested and
then he was killed by the religious authorities (Acts chapters 6 to 7). They
must have wondered what on earth was happening as Stephen was a capable
administrator, full of the Holy Spirit, wisdom and faith (Acts 6: 3 and 5) –
obviously, someone who was valued by the Church community and his death did not
make any sense. There is the temptation to look over the feelings of those
living at the time and, instead, see the episode as a prequel to the conversion
of Paul. This attitude ignores the fact that the believers did not know that
this persecutor would have an encounter with the living Christ, which did not
occur until chapter 9 in any event. Shortly after Stephen’s meeting
face-to-face with the Son of Man standing at the right hand of God (7: 55), we
are told that ‘godly men buried Stephen and mourned deeply for him’ (8: 2). There
was mourning, bewilderment and sorrow as they buried the earthly remains of
this outstanding Christian.
It was not the only perplexment for those believers as
James the apostle was arrested and killed by Herod (Acts 12: 1 – 2) – a passage
from the Bible that is rarely preached upon or referred to in Bible reading
notes, if at all. There must have been confusion for those in the Church,
especially as Peter had been arrested twice (chapters 4 and 12) and, on the
latter occasion, been released miraculously. They must have wondered why James
had not been delivered in a similar manner. If it was me, I would have said:
‘Lord, but we have only got the number of apostles back up to twelve after
Judas had committed suicide (referring to Acts chapter 1), and here we are back
down to eleven.’ It did not seem to make any sense at all, especially as he
could have been involved in spreading the Gospel to lands near and far as the
other apostles undertook. I wonder if his brother, John, as he was shown around
heaven which he recorded in the book of Revelation, was looking around all the
time to see I he could observe his brother worshipping the Lamb whom they lived
with for three years. As John lived for a long time, albeit in exile at the end
of his life, it must have been hard knowing that he could no longer see James
again on this earth, although they would be reunited in heaven.
The history of Church is full of examples of Christians who
have gone to be with Jesus. One would be Robert Murray M’Cheyne, the minister
of St Peter’s in Dundee in the nineteenth century, who was 29 years-old when he
died. There are numerous Christians who died in their early years, remembering
people like Dietrich Bonhoffer. We often forget that another colossus in
Christian thought, C S Lewis, was only in his early sixties – who knows what
other masterpieces he might have produced if he had lived longer? Another
example of Jim Elliot, Nat Saint, Ed McCully, Roger Youderian and Pete Fleming
who are representatives of so many missionaries who died at an early age in
sharing the Gospel (see Deborah’s talk on Elizabeth Elliot - https://studio.youtube.com/video/kfrZs1b6vUk/analytics/tab-overview/period-default).
Later on in the twentieth century, influential Keith Green died in a tragic air
crash, leaving behind a generation who loved Jesus and wanted to share His good
news. Even in more recent times, the February edition of Evangelicals Now
reported the passing into glory of a wise Presbyterian leader aged 54 years and
an assistant minister aged 32 years.
The natural response is to say: ‘I don’t understand’;
indeed, that is the common plea that I send up to the Lord as I demonstrate my
limited understanding. I know that is
what my heart is saying after Deborah has gone to (in her own words) have new
adventures with Jesus. She was a very gifted teacher, with an absolutely
amazing knowledge of religious education which benefitted our county in the UK
and some other counties nearby. Deborah was the most influential person that I
have ever known (and I have met a number of high-profile people), and her love
of God enabled her to see her pupils as He saw them. She shared the good news
of Jesus in the public school system in a way that was natural and attractive,
giving the children (as one of her dear friends and colleagues said) the
vocabulary to worship God.
Deborah was planning to retire two years early so we could
move to another part of the country, to serve and worship our Lord there,
before a couple of brain tumours were the cause of her going home to see her
Saviour. I certainly could not see how and why we had been given this vision by
God, even finding the church where we thought we would join, and it all
crumpled into dust. There are so many questions from an earthly perspective and
things that do not appear to make any sense at all.
One of her Christian relatives remarked to me that it was
because Deborah had finished the work that God had given her to do. My heartfelt
wish was that she had not done it so fast.
Why are Christians, in particular, taken so soon in our
eyes? I do not know the answer and, probably when I get to heaven, I might not
care. People like Deborah leave a legacy for us to honour and build upon. Her
last all-school assembly on the day when she was diagnosed was on hope and
perseverance, looking towards the kingdom whose architect and builder is God
(Hebrews 11: 10).
The pointer to it all is found in our Lord, whom the writer
to the Hebrews directs our gaze: ‘Let us fix our eyes on Jesus, the author and
perfecter of our faith, who for the joy set before him endured the cross,
scorning its shame, and sat down at the right hand of God.’ (Hebrews 12: 2)
Just as Jesus came into the world at just the right time (Galatians 4: 4) so he
completed his task at the right time, even though he was in his early thirties.
He perfected (some translations say ‘finished’) his work so there was no more
to do. The saints who followed after him have also finished what they have been
given by God to do – those who live into an old age have yet to complete their
task.
The writer of Ecclesiastes reminds us that there are common
experiences for us – ‘a time to be born and a time to die’ (3: 2) incidentally
is the first one mentioned – and some people God takes to himself where they are
to hear the divine affirmation: ‘Well done, good and faithful servant!...Come
and share your master’s happiness.’ (Matthew 25: 23) In what I call ‘our psalm’
– Psalm 139, which was read at our wedding, at Deborah’s burial, at the
celebration of her life and will be at my burial – it states clearly; ‘All the
days ordained for me were written in your book before one of them came to be.’
(verse 16) God does not make mistakes and there are his reasons why they should
be with in glory when they went.
What is without doubt is that, if we trust in Jesus and the
work he accomplished for us on the cross, we will be reunited with all who love
him in the time that will be forever ‘now.’
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